Living From An Examined Narrative Identity; An Attestation Of Sorts.

I'm re-reading Tim Keller's The Reason For God. I've been re-reading a number of books over the last 6 months. I find it refreshing to revisit texts important to my spiritual formation, including some of the very first books I read as a new believer. They were over my head at the time, but now have riches I can appreciate and absorb.

As I was up hours before dawn this morning, I returned to Reason for God and was stuck by a couple of sentences in Chapter One entitled, There Can't Be Just One Religion:

"What is religion then? It is a set of beliefs that explain what life is all about, who we are, and the most important things that human beings should spend their time doing."

"Notice that this (i.e., the material world is all there is) is not an explicit 'organized' religion, it contains a master narrative, an account about the meaning of life along with a recommendation for how to live based on that account of things."

"Everyone lives and operates out of some narrative identity, whether it is thought out and reflected upon or not. All who say 'You ought to do this,' or 'You shouldn't do that' reason out of such an implicit moral and religious position."

So what is a narrative? According the the Oxford Dictionaries Online it's: (a) The narrated part or parts of a literary work, as distinct from dialogue; (b) The practice or art of telling stories;  (c) A representation of a particular situation or process in such a way as to reflect or conform to an overarching set of aims or values. Put simply, my narrative identity includes how I understand myself based from my core values, life choices, people I've known and learned from, my gains ans loses; what I've embraced and given myself to for almost 65 years.

Prior to being enticed and found by Christ in 1972, my narrative identity was formed by life in the McDermott family with my father, mother, younger brother, grandmother, and aunts, uncles, and cousins in Albuquerque New Mexico. This identity was also shaped by school chums, girlfriends and the strong family culture of being a middle-class, Irish-Catholic white people in the diverse racial mix of the Southwest. This unfolding identity included the various neighborhoods in which I lived, the liberal Democratic politics my parents embraced and I heard debated; where I went to school from kindergarten to university; being in Cub Scouts, playing baseball, watching television, hiking in the Sandias, having my first jobs, taking lessons and learning to play drums, then becoming a musician.

When I  became a Christ-follower and soon after a husband, my narrative identity changed radically regarding how I understood myself, what life actually meant; what the good - as in virtuous, moral, loving, true - life looked like apart from much of what I assumed prior. I changed my understanding and conformed my way of life around what really mattered as defined by following Christ. I still worked and lived in American culture, but not in an unexamined way. I now had a narrative identity which challenged the story I'd lived before and the meaning of life I'd accepted uncritically: as in what really is of transcendent worth and what isn't.

While the recognizability and expressing of my personality did not alter genetically at regeneration, my narrative identity was revolutionized spiritually, ethically and morally: first below the surface and then in my attitudes and behaviors as i took seriously the reality of sin. I gave my heart to the way of life revealed in the Scriptures and let be influenced by the indwelling unction of the Spirit. I became a new creation and still remained Kit within this new narrative identity.

Forty-two years later, the narrative identity I live today has matured, expanded, deepened, and transformed me beyond what I couldn't have even conceived when I agreed with Christ to give him me. I cannot see any other identity as being of more worth than this one which has bound my heart to the most meaningful STORY in the universe; in fact, the one which gives inestimable value to, animates, and sustains all of Creation. I still live it needing help daily, but this narrative compels and sustains me like no other. I neither seek nor desire  another spiritual identity. I apprehend no other narrative through which people find essential meaning, whether it be political, social, professional, ethnic, sexual, artistic, cultural, or national that would have the power to draw my heart away toward a new narrative identity. I've examined them all and can find no equivalently transcendent meaning which compares in ultimate value. Certainly, there is value and meaning in all of them, but not in a first things way.

Based on the last forty-two years of discovery, exploration, and growth, I can't predict how my narrative identity will continue to develop, but I can attest I will stay put in my Christ-knowing, Christ-loving and Christ-following narrative until my days come to an end here. I've much still to learn and change and grasp, but I've had four-plus decades to examine Christ and His patient, gracious work with the likes of me. Nothing else in this mysterious, beautiful, tormented, astounding  Creation compares; not even close.

My Training to Trust Christ Continues.

It's been a month since my last post. I have no clear idea of why I dried up a bit other than I didn't have that urge to comment on what I was experiencing or thinking about; nothing felt very compelling. I didn't want to fill your reading space with blah-bady-blah-blah.

But what I experienced yesterday morning caught my attention. First, let me give a little background. On December 27th of last year I wrote a blog entitled Wandering From My Comfort Zone Last Week:
 http://oldmenplantingchurches.blogspot.com/2013/12/wandering-from-my-comfort-zone-last-week.html. In it I talked about how my Lord:

"continues putting me into situations where I've never been. They are more stretching than the ones before because I have either no actual expertise in the task or new adventure I tackle, or I feel exposed because doing so increasingly puts me in circles of relationship new or foreign to me. Looking back over five and a half years, I recognize coming to Northampton has been one continuing series of new encounters and endeavors involving all sorts of folks I've never really been around."

I've learned in fits and starts to see following as His disciple includes many opportunities for stretching and deepening. Spiritual maturity is not a vitamin you can take daily with orange juice; it's a more like fitness training sessions where you're challenged incrementally  to get stronger, be more flexible, endure more, and  grow more ready to be of use when the Master summons you to a task, mission or journey.

Often too, God in His unparalleled wisdom will surprise us with one of those "what are you gonna do with this?" experiences. They are often unexpected, and  "Oh, man! What???" unsettling. Yet they can yield  astonishing growth.

Well, yesterday morning, I was on tap to give the message for my friend, Pastor Keith Tolley, at the Greenfield Alliance Church. It was to be the third time I'd spoken there. I know some of the folks because I counsel at the church one day a week. As you'd assumed, I did my preparation and felt ready to share what I'd been given. I also needed to pack a change of clothes because I'd be heading to Hopkinton right after to fetch Tricia and visit our son, daughter-in-law and grand-kiddoes. Normally, I don't wear a jacket and tie to speak as it's gotten more informal on Sunday morning in many churches. Yesterday, I just decided to dress more formally, so I'd need to change when I got to our kid's house. The morning was full of stuff to do.

So, off I went up I-91 for the half hour drive to Greenfield. About twenty minutes out I had an "OH NOOOO!"  thought that I couldn't remember picking up my notes from the dining room table and either putting them in my backpack with the change of clothes, or carrying them by hand to the car. Realizing they were still at home, and I didn't have time to go back to retrieve them would normally give me panicky jolt of anxiety and thus ratchet up my ADD distractability.  From past experience, I guarantee I'd be pretty disoriented.

You see, I'd never left my notes before in all the retreats, classes, seminars and sermons I'd given over the years. I like notes. They anchor my "oh, look ... a bird!" mind to what I'm trying to say. They're like a trusted co-pilot or navigator. They'd not get the chance this time.

But something remarkable and I'd almost say unique to my experience occurred.  The Holy Spirit calmed me within a minute. It was physical. He quietly said I was to trust Him and speak without notes. He reminded me I had studied the passage, and it had been one of my favorite and most-used over the years, especially in retreat ministry. Within a minute, I turned from anxiety to I can do this and it'll be fine. The matter was settled as was I.

By the time I walked into the church, I at peace, engaging folks, and not fixated on trying to remember what I was going to say. Unexpected as well, as I came in, a couple of folks said warmly they were glad when they heard I was speaking and looking forward to it. Normally, from comments like that, I would've been jumping ahead in my  mind to get focused...didn't happen. I grabbed a pew Bible so I had the passage to look at, and participated in worship until I got up to speak.

On I-91, I also sensed the Holy Spirit said it was OK to tell them I was sans notes, so I did. They laughed warmly, and off I went. With the Scripture in front of me and a clear mental sense of the key ideas and structure of my message, I dove in for thirty minutes. Even to me, I was being more focused and coherent; I went places I wouldn't normally, actually preaching the meaning of Matthew 11:28-30. I exposited the text and challenged them to respond  to what one commentator referred to as: "an intimacy of fellowship" as His disciple, choosing to be closely yoked to Him and His teaching, because he was gentle and lowly in heart. I located the text to their experience as a church, exhorting them to come to Him, because of the the endearing humility and magnificent grace in His words to Israel in the1st century, and to them yesterday.

When I finished people were very kind and gracious to me; they affirmed I had connected with something very important to them as a congregation. One person told me she had heard that text preached many times over the years, but never in the way I had preached it. I knew people were paying attention, because a number of them leaned forward and stayed there, a few responded verbally to points I made; there was the nodding of heads in agreement and some were staring straight ahead as if considering their lives differently.

In this post, I want to get across not what I did, but what God sovereignly and unexpectedly did to teach me another facet of trust in Him. He not only calmed my anxiety almost immediately, but He spoke through me to His people. Then, He graciously let me be affirmed for it. Honestly, I could've been all over the place, untethered from my notes as I was, but He showed me, once again, He is all the power behind anything I can do in His service. In hindsight after the service,  I'd left my notes at home, I had this delightfully sneaking suspicion that God had a hand in me leaving my notes at home. I know it's peculiar to say, but the sense was strong and I had to laugh. It was like, "Do you get it? Do you see what I can do in spite of what you carried as your responsibility?" The whole experience seemed another one of His invitations to be free to trust Him. Man, I desire that level of freedom!

More generally, I really am learning to be less anxious in new situations than ever before. It can be there, but not in a disabling way. My ADD is an insidious tyrant let me tell you; it sabotages and steals my "masculine voice" more often than I 'd like to admit. Yesterday, God showed me how trust in Him settles my soul into what I've been given to do with that voice, despite my foibles and ingrained weaknesses.

After the liberty, joy and pleasure I felt when I reflected on what He'd done, I eagerly want more of such abiding trust, especially if I can see God work the way He did. I recognize the next big battleground, and one of the most obdurate for me is overcoming obstacles to I being freer and more direct (with humility, grace and love) in telling others of Christ. To overcome such a stubborn hurdle would be one of the most beautiful gifts He could give me before I finish my race.

He certainly and delightfully surprised me yesterday. He can surely do it again!

When Brothers Listen, Forgive and Reconcile There Is a Kingdom Sweetness Present.

Sometimes Kingdom ministry makes all the effort you put into serving and trying to do some good worth every bit of it. Yesterday in the afternoon after our gathering, I had the opportunity to sit around a table at a local eatery with two brothers who were taking the chance to overcome some hurts between them. Hurst which had broken their relationship.

Two weeks prior, I'd sat with one of them and we talked of how I'd hurt him and he'd hurt me.  Jesus engineered the opportunity by bringing us together at a funeral of someone we both knew. Later, at a coffee place in town, we talked of failure and missed opportunity. The hurting was not premeditated on either of our parts. As we headed into the dialogue, there were nerves present, sure; a year ago our attempts to work out things had gone badly; the relationship was in effect deceased. But at that table two weeks prior, there was a desire in both of us to listen and reconnect. It was strong. We'd shared all sorts of life together before, and because of what happened between us, lost a year until finally being able to sit down, and try to make things right, which is the way we're supposed to live in the Kingdom together. All of us know "supposed to's" aren't necessarily always "will do's."

We did work it out and recognized there was a second conversation needing to be had with another brother  we were both in relationship with. His was pretty much severed with this brother; mine was not.

So yesterday afternoon, we braved the cold wind, trudged up Main Street, and sat down over coffee at a different coffee place. I was not on the receiving or giving end of this discussion. I was there to listen, and pray, and help if things began to run aground. I supported both these men because they are my brothers.

For much of the next two hours they talked over what had happened. Both men were humble, willing to hear, and open to reconciling. The younger man did more talking than the older, but both were very engaged. Pain was shared and sometimes with tears not far away. No rancor nor defensiveness was present, only trying to understand and forgive ... genuinely forgive. I saw much grace and wisdom in how they talked with one another. The tone of their words and willingness to reconnect built a bridge over which they could cross toward the others side. There were times when we all laughed heartily, and there were other times sprinkled in the conversation where listening well and opening to the other's point of view was fully present.

As an interesting side note, there were folks sitting near us and could hear our conversations. The same was true when I had the dialogue with this young brother earlier. In each instance, people looked at us and heard us talk of tough things, yet remain gentle and willing to change. They knew we were Christians involved in church together. It was obvious by the words we used and the issues we worked through. I have to say, what they heard would in no way have disgraced our witness to the fact we are Christ-followers. I think they heard something different, very real, but full of grace from both sides of the table...the way the Kingdom does and should work when we actually live it.

I don't know if the others guys felt it, I didn't ask, but I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit in both conversations. There was a palpable peace, openness, and order, instead of offense, and vitriol, or rigid defensiveness. In the title of this blog, I used the word sweetness. I mean it in the sense of a masculine gentleness and kind forbearance with one another; working well to keep the bonds of filial peace and love; being malleable in relationship to the truth, even that which convicts; and showing forth the heart of God toward one another, realizing all of us were once blind sinners far from God, and needed a cross to make the relationship with him (and one another) right. The Scripture also says where the Spirit is there is freedom. There is a sweetness in being free to forgive, make real peace, and be willing to restore brotherhood in Christ. It's not being weak or nice or feckless. This sweetness is inhabited by the Presence of Christ; it's a fierce love which overcomes our blinded brokenness, and frees us to be human as he lived what true masculine humanity looked like.

If you've read this blog regularly you know I've mentioned before that the Kingdom works when its values, truths and principles are actually applied to real life. More often than we'd like to admit, they're not applied very well, especially when the going is consistently uncomfortable, frustrating, costly or tough. Two weeks ago, and yesterday I saw them applied in two very human brothers, and it left me with quiet joy.

Thoughts On Having Re-formed The inward/OUTWARD Missional Formation Cohort.

Last Wednesday up in our third-floor apartment overlooking Main Street Northampton six of us reconvened the inward/OUTWARD Missional Formation Cohort. I wrote about it's launch in early 2012 if you didn't read it: http://oldmenplantingchurches.blogspot.com/2012/01/thoughts-on-imagines-first.html. We disbanded in the summer, and I was not sure if I'd reconvene it. However, over the last few months the Spirit seemed to bring it to mind repeatedly. Despite some of the problems we encountered with the first, for instance, it being too big and having folks come in and out who were not part of imagine, there was much of great value and formative spiritual and missional import going on. I never thought otherwise.

So in the late spring of this year, I was wanting to provide another opportunity for folks to really talk about and encounter each other's actual life with Jesus: the good, the not-so-good, and the "I'd rather not talk about just yet " stuff. I wanted it to be real, informal and engaging for everybody, similar to what Tricia and I have experienced in Listening in Christ retreat formats. While I or Tricia might set the stage - although not exclusively so - I would encourage everyone to engage all of us as equals, on the same formation journey, while in different places along the road, but connected and close as a cohort necessarily is. Because we were in on the ground floor and have been leaders since imagine's inception it is easy for people to fall in line with that. There are times and places in the journey where such "positioning" is essential, but I wanted to loosen it considerably to explore where it could lead. I wanted freedom and responsibility to unfold from everyone.

We'd had an initial meeting a month or so ago to test the waters with folks, and see if people wanted to do it at all. They did. So when we met this week, I did a quieting/settling opening activity, then set the stage for our evening which would be "weighted" toward open dialogue much in the way a spiritual director would invite a person to talk about how he or she is actually living with God. I guess you could term it group spiritual direction, but neither Tricia nor I would assume a formal director role; we'd participate as well. If things fell apart we could get it back in motion because of the years of experience we've had, but there was no need for that. I told everyone to feel free to ask questions to clarify something or seek more input. Again, I wanted interaction not top-down leading.

The bulk of our time together was talking about how we were experiencing relationship with God these days. Everyone had something to say; there was dialogue, even some offering of insights based what a person had experienced or learned. The conversation was real and people seemed quite free to offer what they were thinking or feeling. I sense there is a mutual hunger for this in everyone. Spiritual life can grow the deepest when people have a chance to talk about what they are actually going through with others who listen, offer support, even a word or two of insight without judgment or sermonizing - you all know what I'm talking about. I think trust was being built, although not because people were afraid of each other. It's just natural to test the temperature of the water before taking the first plunge.You know: what are the ground rules? How are people responding and communicating? What feels safe and appropriate, etc.?

I think it safe to say our first plunge seemed to agree with everyone in the room. Hopes are high for a substantial camaraderie to form including deep friendships, spiritual or otherwise. We want to go beyond the traditional "fellowship," "community-building" group into a life-giving interplay of love, filial support and inspiration which helps each of us follow Jesus with passion and realness. Following Jesus flows out of a vigorous and deepening love for Him, and a life-giving love in real-time for one another as we head down His path together.

By the way, so no one gets the wrong idea we're not pulling away and forming another church; we're still imagine/Northampton with other folks who are imagine/Northampton too, and have been since the beginning. We're just exploring life together in the way I explained above. It should enrich our overall corporate life. I hope similar groups form in our midst so people have a chance to be the church in this more intimate form as well. We do get together with everyone else at imagine for worship and such, but the cohort will be small, weekly, and intentional around growing in the spiritual/missional cohort way which such groups can promote through grace and love.

Stay tuned...

Encountering Two Men Of God

The first man is in his 40's. It happened this week. His build is stocky. He has a brilliant smile which lights his face. He tears up often, but laughs heartily just as often. There's an ease about him which invites approach and conversation. No guile appears in his demeanor or carriage. If you spied him on the street nothing remarkable would detain your eye.

I met him recently and heard his story. After our meeting I was struck by the palpable reality I'd been in the presence of a man of God. If I told him that's my take after meeting he would've been shocked and uncomfortable. He is humble.

I don't use the term "man of God" often or carelessly. In fact, I'm pretty confident I've only met a few in my lifetime who truly fit the definition I hold. A man of God to me is unself-consciously saturated with the love for God and the love of God for others, especially for sinners, outcasts, the oppressed, the unruly, offensive, and invisible ones. Such a man is overwhelmed with the astounding idea of the love of Jesus "for someone like me." a selfish sinner who needs grace and mercy continually.  He is easily and regularly enthralled with the reality that Jesus would do for him what he did. I've also noticed such men are dedicated, and I mean persistently, to the desperate need of everyone to know the Savior Jesus Christ. They somehow grasp the Unseen REAL beyond what most others do, and they take no credit for it. It's just present to them all the time, and very compelling.

In our conversation, we talked of many things and I discovered, because of his love for God and for people, he spends much of his day as he goes about his business watching and praying. It's normal to him. He notices people and talked about a gift of discernment where if he engages someone, which he does even at his work (especially the difficult folks), he sees something about who they are including what's troubling them. He's not afraid to stop what he's doing and goes right up to the person to introduce himself. He said that often in minutes the person is either in tears and telling him, a stranger, of deep pain, or is opening to the Gospel. When he told me each story he'd laugh, slap his leg, or cry, and talk of how much he loved the person he was talking to. Remarkably, the place where he works is not Christian, but he's won favor with the owners because the folks who come by love him and show it.

As a man of prayer he'll often pray for the town and for each home or business he passes. Notable  to me also is the fact God has placed him where he is doing damage to Satan's strongholds. He is helping free captives of darkness. He said he's just drawn to such people. He's not afraid of anyone and will engage them no matter. Because of that he encounters substantial and increasing spiritual warfare. He knows he's in a fight, but the gift of salvation he's been given in Jesus compels him to go after folks spiritually blind and chronically adrift. He wants the lost, found and liberated.

Near the end of our conversation, he began to sob as he talked of the state of the church in America, especially the intolerance he sees coming from churches which would never reach out to certain categories of sinners.  With tears streaming from his eyes, he blurted out "I just love those people so much and they need to know God loves them too.Why is the church doing this?" It was naked and powerful, coming  from deep inside a transformed heart full of grace and love. The unadorned honesty was stunning to me. When he left, I knew immediately I'd been in the presence of a man of God. There was no mistaking it.

I hope to see him again. My soul is lifted and my is heart refreshed in such unexpected encounters.They inspire me to pray for the charity and freedom he has to love others no matter who they are, or if they respond or not. Also, the passionate love for and loyalty to God he radiates with no guile moves me to change and free up too. If you think about it, pray Jesus would be so kind to grant me such passion and liberation.

*****

The second encounter with a man of God came to mind as I thought about writing this post. It was precipitated by the fact he recently went home to God. I haven't seen him in at least 15 years, maybe more. I met him in Connecticut as we were part of a new member's small group at church. I heard of his passing from a member of his family.

This man was also a man of God to me because, although he had a very different personality than the man above, he had the same uncompromising and persistent love for God with the fire to make him known to others, especially non-believers. The difference between him and the man I just wrote about is he had a very difficult personality which could be easily off-putting to folks, especially his Christian brethren. He told it like he saw it, often without filtering, or considering how it might be received. More than once,  folks would get mad at him or remove themselves from his company.

What drew me to him was his unabashed love of Christ and the Gospel. This man had struggled with a very serious addiction and knew God had helped him overcome it. His dedication to Christ who delivered him was deep and tenacious.He was what has been termed a "true believer." He lived and breathed it every day as his prime directive.

For me, with a few notable exceptions, most of the Christians I was around didn't manifest the same raging fire in their bellies for Jesus, or a driving passion to open others to him, especially for the outcasts and chronically troubled ones in our midst. My brother's difficult personalty enabled him to get below deflecting BS from folks used to lying or posing to maintain their destructive lifestyle. His love was fierce, unsentimental and aimed at confronting the powers of evil which kept people entrapped in their own dangerous delusions. He was a "storm the gates" kinda guy - a "what'er we waitin' for," Kingdom fighter who went after souls others would be afraid of or dismiss as too much trouble. His was a tough love, but a deep and genuine love no less.

My brother is dancing in the courts of the King now. His passion and commitment were like a mirror to me, reflecting my own hesitation and immature, self-absorbed cowardice. I admired him for his authenticity. He challenged, even scared me a little by his example, and I knew he was a man of God because of his sheer dedication and fierce love for Christ. He wasn't a man of tears; he was a man of bull-headed conviction which drove him to be counter-cultural, often going only with his Lord and his drive to seek and liberate the bent and broken. His joy was being in the thick of a rescue mission, down in the dirt, and deep in the struggle. He was saturated with the love of God and knew how far God had reached into his addicted heart to pull him toward true love. He wanted that reality for others and went often to go get them

I don't how many other men of God I'll get to encounter in the days ahead, but hope there will be many more. When I do, I know the Kingdom way is real, the love of God is beautiful beyond containing, and there is no life or worldly pleasure worth pursuing from the depths of our hearts other than being servants of the Most High.

If you have stories of the men or women of God you've had the great pleasure of knowing in your life, send them to me and maybe I'll put them on this blog.

TRAJECTORY: Am I Christ's Or Am I Mine?

For the past couple of months in the midst of the unsettling I wrote about recently regarding church, I've also experienced a persisting nudging to go deeper into the spiritual sensibilities I learned in my mid-30's and practiced most assiduously in my 40's and 50's. During my 30's I went through a number of formative experiences which changed my sense of self and what it meant to be a Jesus-follower. In my mid-30's, I went to through a year of inner healing with a wise and gifted Episcopal priest. A few months later, I was stopped in a stairwell after church and prayed over to receive spiritual gifts, especially teaching. Months later, through my brother, Stacy, (who journeyed from Albuquerque at God's prompting), and my wife, Tricia, prayed over me to receive the gift of tongues. A few months after, my brother in-law, Steve, called to tell me of a book he read which revolutionized his way of praying. I knew him to be a man of prayer already, so I heeded his advice, read the book, and began a 30-year journey of listening prayer and journaling. Finally, while going to a Methodist church in Bakerville, CT, I was invited to go on a Tres Dias retreat for men, and later, co-led a mens' retreat at the church. That led to attending the BARN in Simsbury, CT soon after where we were invited to take the elders on a retreat. We taught them listening prayer, and were soon invited to move into the Center For Renewal Retreat House where we led retreats, offered counseling and spiritual direction for the next 20 years prior to moving to Northampton to plant imagine almost 5 years ago.

I wrote all that to give you a sense of the spiritual disciplines we have practiced as normative in our Christian journey, especially over the last 30 years (Tricia even beyond that). I also wanted you to see a bit of the spiritual "trajectory" our lives have taken. According to the dictionary, a trajectory is a path, (chosen or taken), a progression or line of development. In a physical sense, it's the angle, arc or orbit of a projectile as it moves. I think you can see from the little bit of my spiritual history I was moving in a particular direction even though I had no clear perception where all of it was heading. I was just experiencing the movement of the Spirit as I acted according to invitation and opportunity. In many ways it was all quite mundane, but God had a trajectory in mind for me as it turns out. I made decisions about things that looked good to pursue and he moved me into position for what he wanted. At the same time, my sense of the realness and Presence of Jesus with me was acute. Much of my life was about being in the silence with him to pray, listen, read, contemplate and seek. That could happen even when I was with others and it did. I took action because I know when God was nudging me to go.

But at the heart of this blogpost is one question, a central question of eternal magnitude, I think. It's a question more important than any other you or I could answer in this life. It determines where we will give our deepest heart and our best gifts. It reveals how we actually walk with Jesus through our days. This question illuminates what we'll truly give our lives to, and what is our greatest treasure or pearl of great price in reality. Such a question exposes our egos, fears, vanities, confusion, lusts, weaknesses and what we protect more than anything.

There are only seven words to the question: Am I Christ's or am I mine? Put differently, do I belong to him, or to me? Do I spend most of my time on things which serve me or serve him? It's a matter of to whom or to what I give my heart; i.e., my deepest, most persisting allegiance. 

Ask yourself as many of these questions that fit:

• What fills my head most of the time? 

• Where in life are my most cherished and protected pleasures or interests?

• Where, if I were ruthlessly honest with myself, do I want to be left alone to do as I please - including by God sometimes?

• What are my dreams; do they have anything to do with relationship to Jesus and his Kingdom? Is my spiritual life mostly routinized to-do's: go to church, have a quiet time, read the Bible, tithe, be a nice, responsible person, sing in the choir, volunteer for a project, stop cussing or smoking or watching TV, etc.?

•  When was the last time I was overwhelmed with my love for him or sensed the closeness of His Presence?

• Do I ever get the sense I'm going through the motions because I'm spiritually bored or detached from a spiritual life. 

•  Am I struggling with hidden sin which causes me to shy away from being with Jesus much less feel I belong to him because I don't want to give it up?

• In reality, how much am I working to secure my piece of the American Dream for myself and my family?

The thing of it is when we look at the call of Christ on all who would be his disciples there is a pretty rigorous summons to sacrifice their lives and follow him. They were, and we are to be at his service. The motive to do so is because we've experienced the ravishing goodness of who he is on our behalf. One way or the other, we've come to know him as real and near us. Remember that once the disciples saw the risen Christ, they devoted all of their days to proclaiming him in the world no matter if it cost their lives, They finally recognized the enormity that he is God Incarnate who sacrificed himself for the world because he chose to out of unfettered love. When you see God, the other stuff just doesn't sparkle as much.

We all know this because we've read and heard the stories a gazillion times. But curiously they seem a little unreal to us. They're the heroes of the faith, the exemplars. We're just folks. And the reality is we have our hands full needing to keep our jobs in this economy, pay our bills, keep our health insurance, put our retirement plans in place, get the kids to college, maintain a style of living we're comfortable with, and have some time to have a little fun once in awhile. That's reality, right. Yeah ... it's a perspective of reality, and distinctly western. Is it the trajectory we've been called to maintain in lieu of something better? I think not.

Wrestling over the years with my own issues of belonging mostly to me rather than Jesus, I recognize how easy it is to subtly drift into dual trajectories of seeking to attain the felicities and comforts of the world while trying to maintain a respectable spiritual life as a Christian. The problem I found, with notable exceptions, is that Christians spend a larger percentage of their time trying to build a trajectory that makes them feel comfortable, free, fulfilled or safe, and end up largely avoiding actually following Christ where he is working in people around them because it's messy, scary, time-consuming, or they have to sacrifice the quality of life they really want in the end. If we can can get the best of both worlds we feel pretty satisfied. God understands. 

Again it comes down to ownership. Do we belong to Christ who is our Lord and has a trajectory he calls us to which mostly reflects his values, and eternal interests in the world he has placed us in, or do we belong to ourselves which largely reflects American Dream ideals and personal preferences. I think when we finally decide we genuinely want to be Christ's, and that it means a trajectory of shouldering our own cross to carry through a preferred life of service, our spiritual perspective changes, and we begin to see our identities primarily as followers of Christ who is at work all around more than we cared to notice before. Yes, we need to eat, and pay bills and keep a roof over our heads, but the American life of creature comforts, gadgets and leisure pursuits no longer satisfies like it did to one who has crossed over the line of ownership.

Here's why I think that's so. Belonging to Christ defines a spiritual trajectory that is both contemplative and active, spiritual and practical, inward and outward. We seek to be alone with him who is our Refreshing Source and Abiding Fountain of Life. We listen to his voice, study his thoughts and ways, learn to notice his Presence in the ordinary, and find pleasure when we recognize his unabashed love and goodness toward us. It's called FASCINATION. Anyone who has heard his voice or had a revelation he is real, or been touched by freedom and healing because of him stays fascinated because WONDER who is real and loving has opened REALITY which stays close.The more you sit with Jesus and enjoy his company , the more your trajectory will remain in him and flows from being with him.

At the same time because we've been in the company of One who loves and frees us we want to take action in service that the Values and the blessings of the Kingdom are manifest in the lives of people who can't see Him. We want to bring grace, healing, freedom, food, comfort, dignity, courage, friendship, wisdom and reality to our corner of the world or beyond if he summons. Our spirituality is not cloistered away, but in the crowd, out in the streets, and in the homes and workplaces, over the back fence. It's real because we've been with the most REAL and know his heart for this groaning creation. Our spiritual trajectory leads us to benignly overwhelm hatred with fierce love that won't back down because we're Christ's. Our action joins his Presence. We don't make it up; we follow because we've noticed him at work and come to help (nor because he needs us, but because he invites us to join him.

So ownerships begins 

 *****

Learn to sit in the silence in the early morning at home, or by a lake, pond, or river at some point in the day to just be with him who's trajectory of ownership frees you.

Talk to him and listen for his response. Go for a walk with him and open your heart to his beauty and truth.
His trajectory of ownership enlivens you.

Examine your day or the one before, and ask for the grace to notice his Presence there. Thank him for the blessings he sent you that day. His trajectory of ownership lavishes you with grace.

Ask him to show you your sin, especially those which reflect your selfishness and belonging to yourself in your heart, Ask him to reveal your offenses that you might make amends with others.Thank him for his forgiveness.Ask him to free you from any selfish trajectory which steals your heart. His trajectory of ownership washes you abiding forgiveness.

Then, just be quiet and learn to rest at peace for a few minutes.

The Way of Celebrating and Testifying; Noticing and Not Keeping Silent.

Most every imagine/Northampton worship gathering we use the fat cylinder of marbles you see above. Yeah, I know we're weird. Been there; am there; will be there, most likely. Actually, one person's weirdness might just be another person's insight. The reality is our weirdness has meaning: we think Christians should be celebrators and testifiers to the core. We think each through his or her own personality, temperament, and sensibility should develop an attitude of celebration given the enormity of the unmerited grace each one has been given because of Jesus.

On Sunday, we generally begin our worship by giving folks a chance to celebrate the goodness or greatness of Christ by how he's revealed his love for them. From experience, I realize most people think it best to testify to their remarkable encounters with grace, God's provision of healing, kindness or abounding blessing experienced during the week. But to testify to something mundane, seems well, mundane, not particularly worthy of note. In my view, all the ways we are made alive by grace are far beyond counting, from the tiniest to the most monumental. We'll be astonished when he shows them to us.

I remind people that when we hear the word celebrate we need to think of everything from: how our past week was not upended by unrelenting chaos, or fear or danger or loss, illness, cruelty, frustration, stupidity (ours and theirs) etc., to we were able to get out of bed to work another day, or have a roof over our heads. From one day to the next, if we choose to, we'll have bellies full of food we prefer to eat. Yes, we may have had the unthinkable happen this week - because it does for most of us at some point in life - but unless we live in an area of the world overtaken by chaos, it's not the norm. Therefore, celebrating the commonplace or routine is wise. Testifying often and with gratitude to an "uneventful" week is fitting. Pouring out thanks that none of us or those we hold dear went hungry this week is right to do given the One we know behind all our blessings.

I think a hallmark of our being related to the Most High must be our desire to tell of his simple and wondrous works. We are wise to learn the frequent proclaiming of  his greatness, and reminding each other of his goodness. We'd center in REALITY each day by often looking for the evidence of his care and sustaining hand. In other words, a day should never go by without deliberately pausing for a moment to inventory, then acknowledge God's Presence and unmerited favor toward us through the ordinary. Such humility and gratitude soften our hearts to the spiritual discipline of noticing. Taking a moment to perceive God locates us in the REAL behind all that is. The heavens declare the glorious handiwork of God, but so does being able to have a hot cup of coffee in the morning, or being able to wear clean clothes if we want.

And as we make it a spiritual discipline to testify to one another of the Holy Spirit's apprehendable Presence with us each day, we gently entice others to do the same. We point the way. Our noticing and reporting amazing grace unlocks wary lips. Speaking as "normal", Jesus's subtle (and sometimes not so subtle) interaction with his people gives spiritual sight to the hesitant and distracted. When we talk of something regularly over time it becomes to be part of our culture together. Celebrating the Lord's presence in our community helps people begin to look for and share evidence of his life intertwined subtly with ours. God with us becomes God with us because he did this and does that, and "showed up" in this situation, so it goes.

For us the marbles give a light-hearted forum for telling each other how God answered prayer, opened the way for something, healed one of us or someone else, provided just what was needed, is teaching us this or that in real-time situations. Our relating the stories confirms The Story we hold fast to because the God in those stories is the active God of our stories. He's in our midst, and though not physically present in a way we can see him with our eyes, he is spiritually present by how he influences our daily living, whispers in our thoughts, opens our eyes to his Word, answers prayer, uses problems and persisting difficulties to mature us, and sometimes intervenes miraculously such that there is no other reliable way to explain it. Those who seek to know his ways learn to recognize his "hand marks."

The way of celebrating and testifying, noticing and not keeping silent is the way of the Patriarchs, the Kings, the Prophets, Jesus, the disciples, and all who couldn't or wouldn't keep silent throughout the generations since. If God is, then he is to be noticed, celebrated and testified about. It really makes no sense to not tell one another of his faithfulness and beneficent sanctifying in our lives. We are to live/ALIVE as if God is really God so our lives can reflect him. A powerful way we do that is to talk to one another about what our God is doing in and through our days. He's doing what only he can do to make us ready for the weight of glory. So learn to notice his ways in your life. Ask him to teach you of this. Then celebrate what he creates in you, especially freedom and getting to walk with the Teacher of all teachers who will finish what he started in and through you.

Look at the prayer of David below . Notice what he implores his people to do based who he knows God to be and how he has revealed himself in his life:

A Psalm for giving thanks. Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth! Serve the Lord with gladness! Come into his presence with singing! Know that the Lord, he is God! It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name! For the Lord is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations. (Psalm 100:1-5)

PRAYER:

Open my eyes, gracious Father, to see who you are and what you're doing in my life.

           Heal my blindness.

Give me discernment to notice keenly much the Holy Spirit is active and near me all the time.

          Heal my ignorance.

Teach me the way of celebrating who you are and how you're making my life matter.

          Heal my hesitation.

Unlock my tongue and open my mouth to testify often to your beauty, greatness, and goodness.

           Heal my silence and fear.

Let me be one who helps others see you and come close because of how I talk of your liberating love and ways.

In your name, the ONE who is worthy to be honored and celebrated.

Amen.

I Wonder If There's a Way to Be Diffuse, But Deeply Together and Unified When Not Together.

Given we Christians are supremely acclimated to being centralized in our local churches; much of what we do together, we do at or in church. It's our spiritual base, so to speak. Psychologically, it settles us in a shared locational identity as I mentioned in my previous blog: http://oldmenplantingchurches.blogspot.com/2013/05/breaking-free-from-unexamined-tendency.html.We do understand the church is the people, not the place, but we can blend them emotionally without too much effort.

Lately as part of my "container not fitting the brew" metaphor for the church and the Kingdom mission of incarnating the gospel to the community under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, I've been thinking of what it would look like for the church to be diffuse, but unified. Here's what I mean: what if folks who gathered together in a particular church learned how to be on the same mission in unity even when they were apart: in their homes, with their families, at their jobs, in their neighborhoods, in their schools, or going about their errands and other commitments in life such as school sports?

You see, as Americans we're well-trained in being discreet individuals free to pursue our own dreams, carry our own responsibilities, follow our passions and spend time doing whatever captures our interest or fulfills our sensibilities, including spiritual. We're invited to be all we can on our own, or with whomever we choose. You have to take responsibility for your own life and make of it everything you can. That's the American Dream so aim high and have it all!

So we're out there scrappin'. Problem is, we have little or no sense of communitas, http://oldmenplantingchurches.blogspot.com/2012/04/being-we-even-when-were-apart-part-1.html or a profoundly shared mission. We're not self-aware that we are a missional team even though each of us is engaged in different daily pursuits. You have your life; I have mine - we just happen to be "members" of the same church on the corner. We intersect in various ways, but not because we apprehend we've been called to the same mission, and are expected by God help each other fulfill it together and apart. Who does that?

If we were aware that we're a missional team, we'd be gathering to talk about what God is doing in and through each one of us. For instance, we'd all be praying for one of the guy's at Joe's work who's showing an opening to the Gospel, and checking into see how it's going. Or Penny is experiencing a substantial uptick in spiritual warfare because she's prayerwalking in her neighborhood. I don't know about you, but folks don't routinely talk about that or "own" their shared mission because we think individualistically. If we are self-aware that we're a missional team, we'd also be routinely praying together for the Holy Spirit's strategic direction in our town through each and everyone of us. We'd be listening for instruction and focus together. We'd practice the challenging work of group discernment, and learn how to listen to one another talk about what each senses God says is where we're to head out. Our hearts and minds would be knitted together, not just gathered under one roof. The purpose would be to take action individually and corporately, but unified in one heart under the leadership of the Spirit.

Then, Sunday morning worship (the centerpiece of most churches) would become a festive gathering of fully enfranchised and focused followers of Jesus Christ who come to celebrate, testify, encourage, be taught, and worship the goodness of God because he is making a difference in and through us all. We could become acclimated to the reality he still is bringing and creating the Kingdom. In such a free and joyous atmosphere people would find it strange to be a disconnected spectator or passive religious consumer. It wouldn't fit the setting even for introverts.

The reality is we need a sea-change from the church of individuals (no matter they be Baptists, Presbyterians, Pentecostals, independents, etc.) to a communitas of disciples graciously, but deliberately helping one another (no one left behind) be the Kingdom in their communities that others may open to Christ, (their true Liberator), know his Gospel (their true liberation), and become one of his own in this world (their true humanity). Our individuality then turns to a common end, each of us engaged and bringing gifts which fit the task we've all embraced in our neighborhood, town, city or regions. Such a community elevates what it means to be a person to the most noble of tasks: sowing, and nurturing the seeds of healing redemption in another person.

This sea-change starts with leaders persistently casting (initiating and living themselves) an inspiring vision of communitas in their local churches so they might live the life of an empowered follower outside the church's walls. The picture must be painted lavishly of a people summoned by Christ to follow him into the neighborhood, a people with gifts too important to leave in the sanctuary. Soon after, leaders will start to sit with each person in the church, and hear their stories of life with Christ, or their stories of woundedness, failure, disappointment and fear - what they actually experience of him. For some, they will need to offer healing and forgiveness, but also the possibility of a purpose-ignited life with everyone else. At some point in the journey to communitas, leaders must make powerful calls to abiding prayer, and the patient creating of a spiritual atmosphere where people can seek the Holy Spirit (not as mere individuals) to summon them  in the missional adventure the Father has set for them. People will also need to be trained how to discern where God is already working in the community around them, and then how to engage so they can listen to a person's heart in their story. In turn, they'll need to learn how to listen to the Spirit as they engage people. Discernment is key here too. This overall refocusing will require courage, a sense of humor, and a clear-eyed longing to see the church redemptively fecund in the community around it. The leaders have to have the same attitude of Martin Luther when he stood before the Pope and averred: "Here I stand; I can do no other."

This sea-change will also necessitate looking closely at the culture of the church to see where it's set up to promote maintaining the status quo where church-life is mostly life at church, a spiritual feeding-trough, hospital, and way station with teaching. Remember, I 'm suggesting we create church communities where our following Christ is individually spread out through the community, it's diffuse, but unified, single-hearted and single-minded. We are deeply together, linked even when apart because our idea of church is a focused spiritual organism with an eternal purpose and we want to be a part of it. Each of us carries in unity with our brethren the church under the leading of the Spirit; one body, but all of us pursuing our commonly-held mission with Christ our inspiration and fructifying Leader. And we'll be aware of what others are doing as each works with God in their "mission-field,"; one for all and all for one. What my brother or sister is up to with Christ is what I'm doing too.We still meet together, for sure, but not because of habit, rather because we bring stories of the transforming power of God to change lives through ordinary people like us. They become our stories. We've sought and we've seen him be God on our watch and it's wonderful, maybe even more than we ever imagined.

Do you believe it's possible?

I do.

In fact, I think it's supposed to be the normal Christian way of life, the biblical way of life. But as I just wrote about my blog just before this one, Christians and churches have this unexamined tendency to coalesce spiritually, ecclesially, and missionally. They get stiff like an old man. Pretty soon we're all walking in place spiritually and it doesn't seem so bad. We don't even know what spiritual fluidity is like or why it's crucial so we settle and congeal.

Again, I'd love to hear your thoughts. I'm just finding my way in this, so I need all the help I can get!

When the Container Isn't Fitting For the Brew. Questions About Church.

Over the past number of months, I've been feeling a blanketing flatness.

I know it's not depression because I suffered that in the distant past. I'm not dead inside, just not intrigued by most of what I spend my time on. As soon as my rhythm of life is dominated by the managing of the routine, and predictable I fade to flat.

The worst part of it is I'm seriously not motivated by nature to administer an operation. I can do it, but not with much spark or acuity. I make sloppy mistakes, feel overwhelmed more often than is comfortable, and sometimes just flat bored.

As I've said before in my blogs, I'm most alive in the starting from scratch, what-if-ing, exploring, creating, conceptualizing, laying-the-foundations, and launching phases of an enterprise. Helping things come into view and take shape has always been invigorating, sometimes even mesmerizing. As soon as the effort solidifies into a life unto itself needing persistent managing, I wilt or begin to look out the window to wonder "what else?" Horizons always entice me.

Don't get me wrong: imagine/Northampton mostly keeps its head just above water. It's not as if it's self-sustaining or running on all cylinders. God is faithful and people care. There is life within our community, but nowhere near communitas, in my view. And there is much still to do to inculcate a true missional life in each one of us. Some are more missional than others; no one is opposed to it in our group.No one is an exemplar, including me.

But I wonder if the "container" we've unwttingly let evolve over time actually fits the missional "brew" we've said we want to make since we're nearly 5 years years into our Northampton sojourn. One of my abiding fears has been that Christian community can very easily take on a life of and for its own. We naturally develop, or by previous-codified design, implement a culture which defines how we do just about everything together, and it begins to look like church even if you have a funny name, and use marbles in your Sunday worship. By the way, I use the word church in the sense of a group dynamic which solidifies into predictable practices and norms with a life of their own.

What happens is that even if you're a small church, activities together need to be managed. Sunday worship takes center stage; projects need coordinating; people need to resources for spiritual growth. There has to be ministry and ministry leaders. Somebody's got to take care of all the background details and logistics (and they can be like swarms of gnats), or stuff falls through the cracks and the established routine is jeopardized. Everything becomes about maintaining the expected and the status quo. It just does. The structural expected and corporate status quo slowly can train most folks into sleepwalking missionally. That's not good.

So I wonder.

I wonder if there's a way to break free from the unexamined tendency to coagulate spiritually, ecclesiastically, and missionally?

I wonder if there's a way to be diffuse, but deeply together, and unified when not together.

I wonder if the "brew" requires a "container" that looks, and works as nothing at all like a container?

I wonder if there's a way to be a movement without an address?

I think my blanketing flatness is because I know intuitively the container does not fit the brew. And I think I have a notion of what might. I'm going to work on it.

Capacity For Wonder; Capacity For God.

As many of you are aware, Tricia and I've been counseling folks since the late 80's. We continue to do so today. Lately, I've been struck by the sad reality when people run aground in their lives, or get entangled in unhealthy (sometimes destructive) attitudes and behaviors, or suffer binding wounds at the hands of other people, their capacity for wonder goes dark. It makes sense because along with its happy companions, fascination and delight, wonder requires an unforced ability to look beyond to catch a glimpse of stunning beauty, goodness, order, or transcendent Being animating all life.

True wonder and awe carries with it what Rudolf Otto termed in The Idea of the Holy: mysterium tremendum et fascinans (fearful and fascinating mystery). When we are captivated by something and our natural response is unself-conscious wonder, we experience the wholly Other such as when I received as a Christmas present, my first drum set. Later that evening I set it up in my room and lie there for a long while under the snare drum with my head next to the bass drum and pedal. Slowly and carefully I took in every inch of what I could see in disbelief that I possessed such a fascinating instrument. I was chock full of wonder!

You see, the capacity for wonder is the capacity to be intrigued and drawn by something or someone intrinsically compelling. Desire pursues a perceived opportunity for delight, maybe even inspiration and joy.
When you experience wonder you feel fully alive; your senses are heightened to take in full what you are apprehending. You want more of what is so fascinating. You are "taken" by it.

Ultimately, wisdom can summon us to the ultimate, wholly Other: God

Listen to King David:

1 I will extol you, my God and King,

and bless your name forever and ever.

2 Every day I will bless you

and praise your name forever and ever.

3 Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised,

and his greatness is unsearchable.

4 One generation shall commend your works to another,

and shall declare your mighty acts.

5 On the glorious splendor of your majesty,

and on your wondrous works, I will meditate.

6 They shall speak of the might of your awesome deeds,

and I will declare your greatness.

7 They shall pour forth the fame of your abundant goodness

and shall sing aloud of your righteousness.

8 The Lord is gracious and merciful,

slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

9 The Lord is good to all,

and his mercy is over all that he has made.

10 All your works shall give thanks to you, O Lord,

and all your saints shall bless you!

11 They shall speak of the glory of your kingdom

and tell of your power,

12 to make known to the children of man your mighty deeds,

and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.

13 Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom,

and your dominion endures throughout all generations.

[The Lord is faithful in all his words

and kind in all his works.]

Listen to the Apostle Paul:

Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!

34 “For who has known the mind of the Lord,

or who has been his counselor?”

35 “Or who has given a gift to him

that he might be repaid?”

36 For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.

Both men are filled with wonder and fascination at who God is and what he's done. They apprehend the mysterium tremendum et fascinans. They are captivated by and drawn to him. They acknowledged his sovereign Lordship as one who undividedly holds all the keys to life and death; He is to be respected and feared, but more importantly loved and enjoyed. His greatness and revelation are a noumenal signal light.

I consider our capacity for wonder an exquisite gift of God through which we can peer into (however briefly from this side of eternity), the unseen Real behind all our existence. More importantly, this capacity for wonder is, in turn, a capacity us to be drawn in when he reveals something of himself to us, and what really is. We can respond and move close to him (because of  Jesus, by the Spirit), or away from what seems to sparkle, but carries with it the sting of death. Capacity for wonder is a capacity for life and life in/with/for God. We were made for relationship and relationship with him, It is our true being; He is our true home.

So when people are turned away by the sorrows, trials and tribulations of life, they fall away from this capacity. It stills because pain and trouble, or sin takes center stage. All of us have experienced such a temporary "blindness." Some of us have been made so blind by it we cannot see the wonderful or truly worthwhile all around us. We trudge in a dry and dreary place reacting to impulse and experience, but never really seeing into/beyond as God invites us. Such is a true (but not irredeemable) and fearful tragedy.

So more and more I'm inviting folks to return or hold fast to their capacity for wonder as a means through troubles and suffering. I see many get caught in the problem and seem not to be able to reverse course or move beyond. For instance, I talked to someone who's had more than what would seem his fair share of trials and tribulations over many years. His capacity for wonder had been substantially been turned aside. He, at some point in our conversations, related he enjoyed being in nature and fly fishing. It clearly helped him feel alive and engaged. I encouraged him to make time for this opportunity for wonder in his life, and to begin seeing the beauty and goodness of God in what he has created. It would have a healing effect.

I hope he takes my counsel.

I am convinced that capacity for wonder leads to a capacity for God is we look "behind the veil," to consider God's works and ponder often just Who this is Who made anything at all, including us. Doing so brings us ever nearer to what we were made for:

 What is the chief End of Man? Answer: Man's chief End is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever." (Westminster Catechism)

Open your eyes and ears. Open your heart. Confess your dullness and ask God to captivate your heart with wonder so you can see beauty and goodness and truth and a fascinating reality. Ask him to "do whatever it takes" to make it so.

8 Essential Questions For The Church; What If?

For the last two weeks, I've been riveted to the Republican and Democrat Conventions. Even though I grew up in a very politically vigorous family of staunch Irish Democrats (my grandmother even played a role on the national level in the 40's), I'm not a political animal per se. I'll never tell you who I support or which way I'll vote in an election.

But I have to say I was struck to the degree I've never been with the depth of faith and hope people are resting on the shoulders of the Presidential candidates, especially the Democrats' adoration of Barack Obama. It feels almost akin to worship. I know similar adoration has been given other candidates in other elections over the last 200 years. People place all sorts of hope and trust in charismatic leaders who represent to them a better life, or an inspiring message of freedom or prosperity. The longing of the human heart for a happy and liberated life gets ignited by gifted communicators who know the heart's language and how to move it. When that occurs people feel lifted and loyal. Tears flow, smiles abound, cheers ring forth and happy days look likely to be here again because so and so is going to bring them. It's a potent alchemy.

So I have to say, I felt saddened by how much faith, hope, and even love is being lavished on mere mortals. I've never felt that before. It was palpable. There was a kind of "No!" echoing in my head because I'm convinced, such devotion rightly belongs to Christ alone.Only he is the light of the world, the Way, the Truth and the Life, the only Name under heaven by which men can be saved. Neither Romney nor Obama can fulfill the deepest or most abiding needs of the human heart. Don't get me wrong, the "American Experiment" is a unique light in the world. I've spent the last number of years examining the founding, and the key players involved. Miracles were involved. And through the decades, God has blessed the United States repeatedly, and given it prominent influence around the world. Great leaders in government have done remarkable things benefiting generations. At the same time there have been horrors, atrocities and betrayals.

Jesus, the LORD of Lords is the One Americans should ultimately owe their greatest fealty.

If they only knew.

If they could but peer into the unseen REAL.

But don't really know and they don't see.

*****

Do you know who represents His salvific interests in America and in the world? You and I do. We're called the Church. We, under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, bring the Kingdom of God with us whatever we happen to be doing, even if we're unawares. It's our singular mission, not government or business, or unions, or PACs, Social Service organizations, NGO's, the 4th Estate, lobbies, or sports and entertainment figures, political pundits, or Fox News, CNN, or MSNBC, the military or the schools, colleges and universities. The Kingdom mission is the singular dominion and calling of the Church, i.e., anyone who calls on the Name of the LORD, and sees being a Jesus follower as his or her primary identity and calling in their every sphere of influence.

This morning on the porch in Ventnor, I was reading a book by Joel C. Rosenberg called Implosion: Can America Recover From Its Economic and Spiritual Challenges In Time?  I don't know about you, but the "last days" are more and more on my mind and have been for two or three years. I've tended to stay away from reading or speculating about such things, but I'm noticing in a way I've never before. Something's up and Rosenberg, a Jewish Christian, keeps his feet on the ground.

Anyway, I titled my post this way because I want to call your attention to what the author poses to the Church (ppg. 291-2), noting such questions are: "what we should expect and pray for in the American church,". (p.292)

He begins the list with the following passage:

"There are an estimated 340,000 church congregations in the United States. That's an average of 6,800 per state. That's about one congregation for every 900 people. Imagine how rapidly America would change if all of these 340,000 congregations were healthy, strong, brightly shining lighthouses, as God intended.

1.What if they were all faithfully teaching the Word of God book by book, chapter by chapter, verse by verse so the people of God would know the whole counsel of God?

2. What if they were truly helping people repent of their sins, purify their hearts, and heal from their emotional and spiritual wounds?

3.What if they were all actively assisting those recovering people to be able to turn around and care for others who are needy and suffering?

4.What if they were all training their people to share the gospel with their friends and neighbors?

5.What if every pastor was modeling the kind of personal one-on-one and small-group discipleship that Jesus and Paul modeled?

6.What if they were equipping and training young people in the Word of God and their spiritual gifts and helping them plant new congregations in the U.S. and around the world?

7.What if they were truly caring for the poor and the needy in their communities and in countries around the globe, not in lieu of sharing the gospel but as part of fulfilling the great commission?

8. What if they were teaching their congregations to bless Israel and her neighbors in the name of Jesus and to show unconditional love and unwavering support to both the Jewish and Palestinian people?

I recommend you reflect carefully on each question for yourself and for the church where you serve. What is God asking of you? Where do you need to repent? Where are you sleepwalking and need to wake up? How is you church addressing these concerns? Should you raise the issues? 

A Prayer For Us All:

Father of all power, liberty, and truth,
Wake us from where we are slumbering or sleepwalking,
Warm our hearts where we've grown cold and indifferent.
Encourage us where we are anxious and timid.
Dislodge us from where we are stuck.
Summon us from where we are distracted by trifles or overwhelming troubles.
Give us voices to speak the truth with words that enliven and heal;
   that teach and motivate.
Make us people of the Way such that all can yield and want to find it.
Help us follow Jesus in what He is doing all around no matter the cost,
no matter the odds against us, no matter the mockery of the blind and wandering.
Give us tears which liberate and a stubborn resolve that on our watch, you will be seen  and heard in and through us all, your Church.

By Christ, for Christ, in and through Christ.
Amen

Prayer For Being Careful With Your Words.

Last Sunday, I gave a talk at imagine/Northampton called "Our Words Leave Marks On Others." The main idea centered on the  power of the tongue to speak life or death to other people. It can crush or liberate them using mere words. But as a counselor, much of my work has to do with people striving to help folks heal from those rascals. It is no small task for many. A word has the power to alter the trajectory of an entire life. Throwing them around like so much confetti is a fool's errand to say the least.

Of late, I've been composing Opening and Closing Prayers we say together in our worship. The prayers reflect the theme of the day helping us enter in and leave Sunday worship under the umbrella of a commonly- held idea. So I thought I'd share it with you in the hope you could use it to be more mindful of what you say.

Father of lights,

Fill my words this  week with grace and truth, wisdom and gentleness.
Set a guard, Oh Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips.
Set a guard over my heart that I might not be careless, rash or irresponsible in anything I say. 
Let my words give life and liberty, not wounding or discouraging.
Let me hear clearly others words, and speak rightly such that nothing I say deceives, discourages or diminishes anyone.
Visit my thoughts with your Word that I might honor you in every conversation I have.

Make it so.

Amen

Engendering a Culture of Spiritually Fecund Leaders and Jesus-Followers, Part 2.

Continuing with Part 2 of our response to the question put: how can we engender that sort of leadership, that conviction that it is the "normal christian life" I'll begin by averring that a spiritually fecund culture I began describing in Part 1 will gradually be characterized by individual and corporate devotion to Christ, the One who is ever alive and present in our midst, coupled with a consequent lived-out devotion to what matters most to him. Character development, then I think, becomes centered in spiritual formation lived out by sacrificial love and service as the way of life.

In my mind, that means at least three things - under the guidance and with the help of the Holy Spirit of course: 1.) followers of Jesus taking responsibility for their emotional and relational health/maturing; 2.) followers of Jesus taking responsibility for their on-going spiritual growth; 3.) followers of Jesus taking responsibility for embracing God's mission, culminating in embodying the Gospel of Christ in a person's world.


Let me set the stage of bit. Beginning at age 35, the Holy Spirit began to pull me into the world of inner healing, first my own healing, then Tricia's. It took a couple of years. But the end of my soul work, a leash to self-hatred and fear had been cut. I was freed. I knew what it felt like and looked like. I knew how God did it.

Very soon after, God brought someone to us and our 26 years of inner healing and counseling began. Over the course of those years, I started to notice an unmistakable pattern emerge. I saw that men and women who decided to "own" their responsibility for pursuing healing got better. Those who didn't, for the most part stayed bound to their pain and/or darkness. They dwelt in immaturity unawares. It soon was plain to me that an engaged will cooperating with the freeing work of the Holy Spirit increased a likelihood for emotional, psychological and relational maturing. Conversely, when people came to my office looking mostly to blame others, find an easy, painless fix, or were not really serious about heading into distress, fear, and sin, it never went well and they remained spiritually infantile or adolescent . . . again unawares.

To the point of this blog, engendering a spiritually fecund culture of leaders and Jesus-followers requires leaders model and facilitate, i.e., foster the setting where wills are motivated to engage such spiritual maturing because spiritual maturing is communicated as the desired Christian life, and opportunities for such growth are many. In such a cultural atmosphere, people become well aware that emotional and relational maturing is not solely the job of the pastors, elders, Sunday School teachers, small group leaders or "spiritual parents." People are poked graciously, creatively and often to "do what it takes" to mature, as well as, heal rifts between one another. Help is generously offered, but people must step up and engage. Then again, time, emotional and relational growth is not seen as an end in itself. Rather, it is viewed as a gradual spiritual tempering and tuning, deepening character and making one fit for the Kingdom work to which he or she has been summoned.


Therefore, in my eyes, emotional and relational maturing is foundational to engendering a culture of spiritually fecund leaders and Jesus followers. Graciously expecting everyone is summoned to do such internal work themselves as the Spirit prompts is a Kingdom enterprise of leaders no matter how programmatic their church milieu. If it's not done, a church can wind up with perpetual "feed me" spectators, and burning out leaders scrambling to pour milk into all the open mouths gaping from one week to the next. 

In my work helping people free and grow up, I also realized those who pursued (as the normal Christian life) knowing Jesus intimately became spiritual leaders from their heart-driven following of him. Merely going to services on Sunday to sing, hear a good, uplifting sermon, and be prayed for after church was not enough for them. They took and held responsibility for finding and using the richness of what God made available to the Church for learning and followed hard from a surrendered heart and an informed mind. I liken it to becoming deeply knowledgeable or skilled with the essentials of one's work. There is investment and motivation and individual effort. Such people don't have to be enticed, or prodded. They embrace Jesus, His Gospel and Kingdom mission as their primary identity out of which all life flows - their normal Christian life.


Therefore, engendering a spiritually fecund culture of leaders and Jesus-followers in this regard means being less: "well, how about if we do this or offer that? Maybe this will be an exciting sermon series, or let's bring in that big gun, or have you heard about what's going on with revival over there; how about we get in on that? I'm not saying  new ideas or nascent moves of the Spirit are to be ignored outright, but the discipling bar has to be held high, and kept there, not as some legalistic super-spiritual club for elites, but as an inestimable treasure, well-worth everyone giving their all for, even if a person's life is a mess and it's going need some fixing. Spiritually fecund leadership and followership must reflect a passionate longing and resiling dedication for the glory of God manifested, so the bent-over are given generous dollops of the Good News. It's a matter of the heart in leaders and followers; what it truly desires . Hungering for spiritual growth and maturing is like glimpsing the beauty of heaven's standing invitation because one is family member, and spending life pursuing it, and then out of a joyous overflow, reflecting the family values to family members who've never dreamed they're invited. 

I'll close my post with the idea that engendering a spiritually fecund culture of leaders and Jesus-followers will be a training environment, particularly as it pertains to fostering a growing embrace of God's Mission culminating in embodying the Gospel of Christ in a person's world. Everyone in church communities should be gradually trained to recognize they are a Kingdom missionary selected by God, sent into the world under the guidance of the Holy Spirit "to proclaim the excellencies of him who called [them] out of darkness into his marvelous light," (1Peter 2:9), and to enflesh his love through sacrificial service and manifesting the good. The Gospel mission of God is entrusted to the people of God, each and every one. It is their calling and their completing.


Therefore the normal Christian life is life on mission. Church leaders are tethered to the task of proclaiming, modeling, counseling, exhorting, encouraging, and inspiring people to follow Christ into their neighborhoods, workplaces, schools, towns and cities - ready to live the Gospel in a way others can make it out, and be intrigued (even if,at first, they're antagonistic, by the way). Leaders do well to communicate the reality of the call in a way that people can see it's really possible for "ordinary ol'" them to take up the mission. It will require patience and time to help people unlock or open to the possibility God uses folks, and the story they have to tell of how Jesus moved into their lives, changing the whole deal.


Leaders also need to train people how to overcome the relentless intimidation (at least, at first) of their adversary who assaults them with fear, lulls them into spiritual sleepwalking, or obstructs with life's exasperating entanglements and roadblocks. They must be given spiritual eyes to see (read discern) the tricks and subterfuges of the one who seeks to grind them down, turn them aside, or trap them in labyrinths of sin. He's part of the missional landscape, but we've the Cross, the Resurrection, the Scriptures and Spirit.
Leaders give them spiritual tools for the fight and fight along side them. Spiritual fecundity grows strong in the fight when people press on because Christ in them has overcome the world, the flesh and the devil.


By the way, lest I sound insensitive to the reality of crippling human pain, sorrow and suffering, I'm not. I know what it looks like from the work I've done, and what my family has endured. I've been asked to help in almost every variation of evil possible within the human condition, at least in my various necks of the woods. I agree leaders must create healing communities as well where the wounded and breaking can come to rest and refresh. Sometimes that takes a while . . . a long while. Occasionally, there are tragic casualties. The world we find ourselves in gives place to the church as a sanctuary and spiritual hospital. Our leaders are to help care for the sick, wounded and deeply tired or severely broken in our midst as they are also training up people to: mature emotionally and relationally, take responsibility for their spiritual growth, and enter the mission of the Kingdom in their sphere's of influence.


I know there's much more to be said about this spiritual fecundity business, but I'll let you chew on what I've offered for awhile. 

I'd love to hear your questions and concerns.

Putting Fresh Meat on imagine/Northampton's Byline.

A few years back when imagine was still a hope and a dream, we settled on the following byline to capture the spirit of our vision and mission:

Helping People Discover the God Who Is Far More Than They Imagine. 

As with any byline, it can tend to get threadbare and lose meaning with overuse, so I thought I'd do some refreshing. I think our statement of desire is filled with rich meaning and wonderful implications if you look at it closely.

1. Helping: Properly translated in imaginese helping really refers to drawing alongside of someone to build an authentic, mutually meaningful relationship where opportunity for heart-to-heart conversation gradually can become part of the fabric. Through earnest loving and serving a person, a person might give you the chance to explain the "hope that is in" you because of what Jesus has done, and who he really is. Thus, helping in this way is more than merely evangelizing, winning souls, or "sharing our testimony." It's rather more like "because I genuinely love you, and have shown it in a way you've come to trust, may I open you to what has brought such life, healing, or (you fill in the blank) to me? Telling your Jesus story (1Peter 3:15) then becomes giving your greatest treasure to someone who really matters to you. If they choose to explore, then it is also our privileged responsibility to lovingly help them through whatever wrestling may take place for however long it takes.

BTW: I hope it goes without saying that even if they say "thanks, but no thanks," you stay being their friend.

2. People: That means everyone regardless of prior belief, age, race/ethnicity, nationality, religion, sexual orientation, political affiliation, culture, or even where they fall on the dreaded Yankee/Red Sox divide. Every person bears the image of God and is more than worthy of we loving and serving them, even if they function as an enemy or irritant to us. People are the focus of our helping, especially those God has put in our midst, and in whom he is already at work. Being gracious to all should be the "way we roll." This gets interesting when God wants us to start relating to folks far different from us. We can feel uncomfortable even anxious, but God wants us to learn how to love and serve them in spite of initial awkwardness or substantial unfamiliarity. They may never respond, but not for lack of our being willing.

3. Discover: (def: bringing to light something previously unknown.) If we do the work God has given imagine we will help people become aware of the God we've come to know and follow. While it is his work and his alone to change a heart or regenerate a person, it's our task to do everything we can in helping someone apprehend the possibility of him, to perhaps perceive who he is intuitively, or grasp intellectually the ontological reality of such a God. To do that we must listen well, both to the Holy Spirit and the person. We must be gracious, humble and patient, always looking for creative ways to help people make a connection with Jesus without being ham-fisted or argumentative. We need to prove nothing. He will make his case in their hearts. We merely make the effort to help them see him through our story, and how try to we live. We ultimately desire discovery to be "come and see," but it must never be forced, scripted or manipulated. 

I'm also assuming we should spend substantial time praying for the person(s) God has led us to. We will be entreating the Father to draw this person to the Son (John 6:44) Prayer opens the way. It is a mysterious and powerful interaction with God which brings the life of the Kingdom into our present reality.

4. The God Who Is: At imagine, we understand this God as the singularly Most High God of the Old and New Testaments. In the OT, he is known as Yahweh Elohim, the all-powerful "I Am That I Am, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. In the NT, he is known as the Trinitarian Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Jesus Christ is seen as the Messiah, King of Kings and Lord of Lords who "in the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. In him was life, and the life was the light of men." (John 1:1-4) Our God who is, according to John, is "the Word who became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son  from the Father, full of grace and truth. It is him we follow, serve and work to help others discover with the guidance of the Holy Spirit in us. It is through this Most High God Who became flesh and dwelt among the first believers, by his Most High God Who became flesh and dwells by His Spirit among us, and for this Most High God in Whom we live and move and have our being such that imagine/Northampton exists at all.

He is our beginning and our end, our sine qua non and highest aspiration.

5. Far More Than: This Creator and Redeemer God cannot be contained in our conception of him. The only reason anyone in this world comes to know him whatsoever is because he reveals it to them. Our minds cannot fully apprehend his glory, majesty, beauty, or power. And yet, because Jesus became one of us, through the Holy Spirit we can come to know him, and thus receiving his love and forgiveness. Nonetheless, he cannot be contained in a book or a painting or a theology or a mystical experience. Nothing we can experience or apprehend through our mind or senses can move past scratching the surface of who he is on this side of heaven. We have nothing to compare him to beyond the glimpses he has gives through his Spirit. At imagine, we want people who follow gods of this world or no god at all to journey toward this God with us, and experience being loved by him who fashioned them and put his image on them.

6. They Imagine: [from Latin imāginārī to fancy, picture mentally, from imāgō likeness] In our mission to help people discover him we want them to freshly imagine and wonder toward, dream about, create, and enflesh the Kingdom of this God who frees, heals and restores people to life. His Kingdom contains the way of true life and liberty because it's animated by unexpected grace and love. It upholds values like humility, goodness, gentleness, kindness and compassion. This Kingdom teaches a way of life counter-intuitive to what most people have come to accept as "the way it is" in our culture.

We also want to "see" what could be because of Jesus and his Kingdom. We want redemptive "what-if''s" to spill from hearts full of courage (enheartenment) to see good things come to be: enlivening and healing things, refreshing and soul-liberating things for so many bent over by the tremendous weight of their lives. We want God to stretch our imaginations so we can "come and see" well-past where we could imagine when we first came to Northampton.

A byline which animates the spirit and heart of a people carries within it the seeds of new life which can multiply way beyond their small beginnings because it has the potential to manifest remarkably what God wants from his summoning them in the first place.

May the same be said of ours...