Yesterday I half-jokingly posted a "Happy Introverts Day" on my Facebook page. I really mean "half-jokingly" because those of you who know me well know I am a card-carrying introvert. I recharge alone rather than in a crowd. I hole up in my "cave" and spend time just being. If I don't, I will become irritable, overwhelmed and distracted (my ADD kicks into overdrive and I spend all kinds of time chasing my tail). Not pretty at all . . . and frustrating.
So why does this old man think he can help plant a church? Aren't church planters by definition extroverts out and about with the people all the time, getting jazzed from multiple and frequent contact, and never tiring of hanging out? Well yeah that's the model, and it makes sense because much of church planting is building relationships with strangers. If you shy away from doing so the entire enterprise will likely be painful.
So what business have I in trying to do this? Well, some days I really wonder. I have those days when the dissonance inside me from having to go out and meet people, or introduce myself to strangers is deafening. I want to avoid going out there like the plague. Procrastination becomes a trusted ally: I just need to get this last thing done before I head out. That last thing takes the rest of the day. Well played, cowboy.
I know I have to come to grips with the reality of my introversion. It is part of the "factory-installed" equipment, not merely an accessory. Truth be told, I will church plant the way an introvert has to church plant. God understood that when he called me to the task. God sees what isn't as though it were.
So what does an introverted old man planting churches require to have a ghost of a chance of actually planting one?
1. The necessity of balance: I will need the alone times. On the other hand, I will need to balance them with frequent people times. My personality has to have both for me to get done any fruitful planting. So balance can mean spending an entire day or weekend "holed up," followed by spending an entire day or weekend engaged with others. Or it can mean days sprinkled with both. Balance is required no matter its configuration.
2. A penchant for flexibility: I can't be rigid in how I spend my time. I need to be able to react when an opportunity presents itself to connect with someone new. I also need to have the freedom to let it all go when I have to recharge for a day. It is not selfish to do so.
3. Obeying the priority of getting out there no matter how I feel: Obedience to the call should never be ruled by how I feel from one day to the next. I have been sent here to plant a church, and I best be getting after to it one way or the other. Feelings can overwhelm me so I have keep the "prime directive" ever before me when the feelings intrude. Obeying God makes things of worth happen.
4. Grace finds and makes the way: Even though I am an introvert in a role most attuned to extroverts, I have to rely on grace to make the way ahead right and fruitful. Without grace I will be neutered and impotent no matter how hard I work or clever I am. God's grace creates the opportunity, gives the ability to explore it, and produces any Kingdom result lying hidden within. Grace is an exquisite lubricant and ice cutter.
5. The Holy Spirit guides and enables: Working by the rich means of grace, the Holy Spirit makes alive what is merely latent. The Spirit can take any introvert and make him or her efficacious for the task. It is the Spirit who ultimately makes a way where there appears no way forward, or I am just up to my eyeballs in me and can't do anything.
6. God will use my interiority to his advantage: Introverts tend to think about stuff, even ponder continually the essentials of what he or she is doing. God takes thought and turns it to his use when a person's true heart desires his glory first and foremost. Such desire demands action. While it may be a challenge to leave the place of thought and dreams, the power of God trumps my penchant for living there. He has done so since the beginning of the imagine/Northampton adventure.
Lastly, I realize my introversion will remain in tact until I breathe my last breath. I will need frequent and substantial times-out for the duration. I also understand I have been called to plant this wild-hair dream called imagine/Northampton. There will be all sorts of new people still to engage and draw in. I will feel the dissonance of my introversion often, but I will also feel the Spirit's promptings to go anyway and be of use to the reason I was sent.
My introverted nature "is what it is," as they say. But God is the Master at taking it" and turning it into" it has become what no one would have imagined."
Introverts get to be a part of such wonders too.
I know because I am a witness.
5 comments:
I feel you pain, my brother introvert; here I am serving as the public face (for now) of the new venture in Northfield. One minute, yes! The next, ugh! And it's not a function of faulty will or vision or faith, simply of druthers rooted in constitution, and by the grace of the One who calls us, we can do it. Thanks for the six-point check list. For an old guy, you rock! Or should I say swing. Cheerio!
This is a great post!! Really helpful. Have you seen my book Introverts in the Church?
I think I will be adding this post to my favorite introverted articles on my blog.
I thank you for this, Kit.
For some reason this topic really seems to be surfacing. I am an introvert who has been striving for decades under the impression that unless I become a extravert I will fail as a pastor and leader. So that was my project for many years and I forced myself to learn extraverted skills. I can walk up to a stranger now and stick out my hand and say. "Hi, I'm Darius" and I have found it to be life-givig and fun. But woe unto me if I don't get around to my time in my quiet place of prayer and reflection. A couple of hours a day seems to be about right. I appreciate the emphasis in the post on the truth that God's power is not thwarted by personality type - otherwise what would have become of Moses?
The same could be said for introverts who want to be superintendents as change agents in schools for kids. I understand the conflict and dissonance well. I have always called myself an "extroverted introvert". I can put on the role of the extrovert, when I "play the part". Sometimes it's easy, sometimes, not. God has provided me with the grace to do what I need to do when thrust into the world of the extrovert. My struggle is balance. It's hard to carve out the time I need to "hole up" in order to recharge. It often requires coming to work very early before anyone else, so I get that time, or staying very late. Neither of which is necessarily best, but it is what it is for now. I have much to learn about the balance piece. Thanks for your insights - very helpful. God bless you as you seek to do His will in the context of how He wired you.
Hello Kit,
This is right on time. I could not have said it better myself.
It explains a lot and helps me to understand that it's okay to be this way and we can still be of service to God and the kingdom.
I am an introvert myself. I can deal with people or crowds only for so long then I must retreat into my own quietness.
It is true the only way for me to revive is to be alone in my "being" state of mind.
Thank you so much for this because I can relate totally and not only that it explains my personality type as well.
Since my health has not been all that well I am even more of an introvert. However with the gently and loving prompting from the Holy Spirit I too am able to get through the toughness of being with others.
Everything you have written here is so true of myself.
Thanks and may God continue to bless you and strengthen you for this mission every day.
All for Christ
Grace
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